I wrote this for you because, as you know, you are more interesting than me.

1. This isn’t even close to what you thought adulthood would be like.
2. You don’t spend enough time outside.
3. Your parents are secretly disappointed in you.
4. You are secretly disappointed in them as well.
5. You didn’t understand what the big deal was but you pretended like you did.
6. Despite all evidence to the contrary, you think are an above average driver.
7. Despite all evidence to the contrary, you think you have a great sense of humor.
8. You’re going to wait until it gets a little worse before you see the doctor.
9. You are never going to finish that book.
10. You still believe you got a good deal at the time.
11. Deep down, you don’t really like classical music.
12. You don’t remember that person at all but still made them your “friend.”
13. You usually stop reading inane lists about halfway through.
14. You know there is no evidence but you believe it anyway.
15. You won’t drink Goldschlager after that one time in college.
16. You are kind of worried that your ISP knows what web sites you visit.
17. You often act like you don’t care but then you won’t shut up about it.
18. You know that the “five second rule” is really thirty seconds if nobody is looking.
19. You don’t have the guts to tell the woman who cuts your hair that it looks kind of lame.
20. You had that Anderson Cooper dream again.
21. You didn’t intend to eat the whole bag.
22. Even if you don’t start on it until tomorrow, you can probably still finish it in time.
23. You’re usually pretty good at it but you’re just out of practice.
24. You hint at your own insecurities in lists that are ostensibly about others.
25. You’re not as bad as everyone says.